The Most Boring Post Ever...
Okay, so I'm sitting here trying to think of something to write, because, well, you know, this is blog writing time. I'm a super busy type-A worker bee during the work day (oh, puh-leeze), so I've got to confine my blogging to the bookends of the day when work-kids-wife-dishes-laundry all don't hold sway over my time.
So I've got the Beatles on media player, currently playing Abbey Road, which has some cool, different stuff. There's this neat little ditty toward the end of the album,
"Her majesty's a pretty nice girl
but she doesn't have a lot to say
Her majesty's a pretty nice girl
but she changes from day to day
I wanna tell her that I love her a lot
but I gotta get a belly full of wine
Her majesty's a pretty nice girl
someday I'm gonna make her mine
Oh, yeah, some day I'm gonna make her mine"
So, like Paul's stalking the Queen? Let's see. This is 1969. The Queen was born in 1926. She was 43 at the time... She's a MILF, that's what Paul's trying to say, isn't it?
Which leads us to (God! I love the internet, it's like the biggest enabler of ADD ever) people born in 1963. Well, because they're 43 now, silly person. Who's on the list?
Helen Hunt. Okay. She's cute. I could see writing a stalker song about her.
Randy Johnson. Ergh. Blaugh.
Kathy Ireland. Ahh. Kathy Ireland. SI's 1989 Cover girl. (Who's apparently trying to become Martha Stewart, minus the insider trading.)
Oh Kathy, Kathy. I could certainly write a stalker song for Kathy. Kathy and I had some very intimate moments in high school, where we often spent much time together in my bed... Did I say bed? I meant head, where we spent much time together in my head.
My drive to be the famous world traveler you see before you is due in part to my belief that if I was famous I could get invited to cocktail parties where Kathy, and Mary Lou Retton, would be.
Yes, Mary Lou Retton... oh my. She's the other great love of my life. Now she's all married with four kids and is happily married and all, but I don't give up hope that someday she might see the error of her ways and we will be reunited... Well, for me it would be reunited. For her it would be the first time, you know, because she didn't really know about our relationship.
(And Mary Lou's a Republican... So it could happen!)
There, that's another thing to put on my to-do list when I'm elected Governor of this Commonwealth. #1 Retire as a Patriot. #2 - Have Mary Lou Retton up for a quiet, romantic dinner for two fundraising event.
All right. Gotta go get started on my day. Hope you all have a lovely day filled with Internet surfing, free lunch, and adoring children bringing you your slippers when you get home. I know I won't...
(P.S. - I'm moving the non-dumb posts over from the old blog to the new one, so random old months will show up in the archives from time to time (or old posts will get links from new posts, and I'll have to put those old posts over here on the new site, get it? Like that one above about the Pats... See, up there? It's a link. Feel free to go click it... Go now... There you go.. edge that mouse up... Hover over the link... click... click... CLICK DAMN YOU!!!)
5 comments:
Kal I am a little concerned over your recent facination with older women. Are your loyal readers witnessing a internal emotional struggle playing out in public? Or are you just hot for MILFs.
On the other hand, I fully endorse your infatuation with Kathy Ireland. Amoungst her many other virtues, she is also a homebrewer! She was the Cover Girl for Zymurgy Magazine's 1988 special issue. Check it out - http://www.store.beertown.org/shopdisplayproducts.asp?id=16&cat=Zymurgy and scroll down. Mmmmm. Beer and boobies.
Abbey Road is one of my all time favorites. I get "Oh Darling" stuck in my head like every week.
Bollix - our wives both fall into that category, so I better be hot for them, right?
HM: You know, I was going through my Beatles collection and I can't pick a definite favorite. Sgt. Pepper is the most evocative for me, as I was doggedly pursuing a high school flame (alas it was not meant to be) at the time and each song reminds me of some particular phase of the "relationship".
I was 10 when John Lennon was shot and can freely admit to missing the whole Beatles thing. I can appreciate how, much like Elvis Presley, they changed the face of music, but I don't like them.
My "relationship" songs went from Madonna's Borderline to Pink Floyd's "Goodbye".
Oh, and Mr. Jones - I'm calling you out.... I'm way ahead of you on posts.
I am looking for a angel and I found one! Kathy Ireland. running a multi million dollar company and still has time to mentor unfortunate undeprivilaged young mothers. I have tried some many of her products just because her name was on the label and was surprised that everything was of the best quality. I hat is off for Kathy Ireland Woman of the Century.
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